Editor’s Note: Not a month goes by that I don’t hear of some faithful preacher or dedicated church member losing their marriage and thereby “fall from their own stedfastness” and spiritual duties. Certainly the devil knows that if he can hurt our homes and our marriages, he can greatly hinder the work of God and bring reproach on the name of Christ. When a Christian home is destroyed it is always tragic with far-reaching impact. Clearly, we would all do well to make a greater effort to work harder for a good and successful marriage and home. Below you will find some very practical helps for your marriage. May the Lord help each of us to apply these practical thoughts to our personal lives for HIS GLORY!

10 Marriage Mistakes

Over the years I have counseled scores and scores of people with marriage problems. One of the common denominators I have found in most counseling sessions is that most people do not think that the problem is with them. They feel their spouse is to blame. They are blind to their own problems and mistakes. That being said, I want to encourage you to prayerfully examine yourself. Perhaps these practical tips could be applied personally to the betterment of your marriage. Below are common mistakes married couples make….

1. Talking "at" instead of "with" your mate. When you're talking "at" your partner, he or she will tense up. When you're talking "with" your spouse, he or she will relax.

2. Tuning out -- instead of tuning in -- to what your mate is saying. When your mind begins to wander, stop and remember that what your partner is saying is important to him or her.

3. Forgetting to thank your mate. Not thanking your spouse for being considerate, thoughtful or kind makes him or her feel used, unappreciated and foolish for caring about you.

4. Getting defensive instead of saying, "I'm sorry." When you mess up, the sooner you sincerely say, "I'm sorry," the sooner your mate can stop resenting you.

5. Always saying, "I'm sorry," yet never changing. An apology buys you another chance. However, if you keep making the same mistake, apologies not only seem empty, but annoying as well.

6. Being repeatedly late. Frequently keeping your partner waiting is not only inconsiderate, it's arrogant.

7. Playing the victim. This behavior not only accuses your spouse of hurting you, but adds insult to injury by implying that he or she is doing it intentionally, when that may not be the case.

8. Jumping to conclusions. Presuming that you know what your partner feels -- and why -- without first getting all the facts, is only going to push him or her away.

9. Badmouthing your spouse behind his or her back. This will destroy the foundations of your relationship. It also tells others how little you respect your partner.

10. Thinking that doing something once is enough. If you only temporarily stop making the above mistakes -- and don't continue to monitor yourself to keep from slipping back into bad habits -- you're teasing your partner with changing. You are also kidding yourself that you're committed to improving your marriage, when you're really not. Having a good marriage is hard work, but it’s worth the time and trouble.